Happy June friends! You may not know this but, today is my most favorite day of the year. Today is the Hubby and I’s anniversary!!!!! We have been married for 5 years today. Our marriage is a half-decade old. In some ways it feels like we just got married and in other ways it feels like it should somehow be longer. Nick and I have packed a lot into these 5 years: 5 moves, a couple career changes, some big adventures, a new car, and 2 kids plus one on slow cook. Life has not been dull and I am so excited to see what this next year of marriage has in store.
The other day I was spring cleaning my phone-getting rid of old notes, old emails, apps I no longer use etc. and I came across an old note to myself titled “Manifesto.” It was dated 5/12/2017. I wrote this note to myself 3 weeks before my wedding. Curious as to what would have been on my mind that close to my wedding and what would have prompted me to give the note such a title, I opened it up. Inside I found this:
I want others, including my future children to see that I love being a wife and I specifically love being Nick’s wife.
This note simultaneously brought a smile to my face and a check to my heart. The smile for the fact that those future children have made and are making their appearance in our lives. The heart check for the fact that I do not believe that I have lived this out as well as I would like-at least not in my heart.
I do truly love being a wife and specifically love being Nick’s wife. I have known I wanted to be a wife and mom from a very young age. And I knew I wanted to be Nick’s wife for nearly 3 years before he finally figured it out (a story for another time.) Life has not been easy however, and there have been times over these last five years that I have allowed anger, frustration, differences, miscommunications, and disappointments to rob me of the joy of marriage. Our marriage is not perfect. We both struggle with communicating effectively when we are overwhelmed or frustrated. We struggle with being intentional about planning date nights, getting stuck in the daily grind, and choosing joy. Our marriage is not perfect, but it is wonderful. Nick is an incredible husband and watching him grow in that role over these past five years has been a tremendous honor. He daily seeks Jesus. He pursues me and the boys. He lets God tell him hard things and he chooses to work on those things. He has been single handedly holding down the home front while I have been incredible sick this pregnancy. He is brave, generous, kind, smart, funny and I’m so grateful to call him mine.
Today, I am recommitting to myself and to anyone who decided to read this far, to uphold my manifesto. I am recommitting to choose to see marriage as a daring adventure full of highs and lows, twists and turns with two people working out their -ish to become more like Christ. Happy Anniversary my love! I’m excited to spend the day celebrating with you.
If you are struggling in your marriage, if you one day long to be married, if your marriage is amazing but you still want to grow, or if there is a marriage you know that you would like to help encourage, below are a few of my favorite marriage resources.
Podcasts: Married with Benefits, Family Life Today, Blended and Blessed (for blended families)
Books: Fun Loving You by Ted Cunningham, The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman, Vertical Marriage by Dave and Ann Wilson, Love Like You Mean It by Bob Lepine
Events: Weekend to Remember Marriage Getaway, 5 love languages marriage conference.
If you want to attend a marriage conference right in your own living room, you can watch this one by Ted Cunningham that was hosted by Springs Church. There are three sessions each about an hour long. Here are the links:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yxwK4-uBgUY (The Source of Life)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rqb7via2ro (Date Night Challenge)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLXT573wAhg (Catch the Foxes)